my own crib

 i have a small crib but its too small to house 3 people.

the baby essentials - diapers

been looking around if there are any reviews of merries tender love as its slightly cheaper than the standard merries - but cldnt find it.

been happy with r&f and pampers dry but pampers always become like a g-string because my girl like to do leg raises. r&f is good but its slightly tight now around the thighs cuz its quite a small cut.

i like the absorbency of r&f, it doesn't become nua nua after 12 hours of usage and still in shape, but pampers becomes nua after a 2-3 hours and out of shape. so normally i use r&f in the night.

i havent seen how merries look like after a night's use... will try and see.

i heard peekaboo is also really good. i havent tried, maybe some day.

this is one of the youtubers （子时当归 ）enjoy watching because she prepares nice food, actually she was my inspiration in 2018 where i thought i wanted to also start a vlog. 😅 but i didnt do it because... i think i have poor filming and zero editing skills. 

so i began with ig stories. but soon, i didnt have much topic to share, or i lost the interest. and now, thinking i shld start blogging again, perhaps its better? no need to edit. 

should i or should i not?

my life after flying

 hello to myself (because i have no readers 😛)

its mid of last qtr of year 2020 and i didn't accomplish anything other than being a mother.

actually i dont really feel that there is any change in status.

is it normal?

so whats my life after flying.. i was home for close to 10 months.... and i just started a new job beginning of the month.

i miss flying, i miss my colleagues. i miss being Y3. selling duty free and earning the commission even though it was a tough job. but due to pregnancy and covid, its almost impossible to fly again.

i miss flying....

i am 5.5mths pregnant now... im still waiting for a report from kkh, gave them a ring yesterday and they said they will put up the request to return me a call.. so im still waiting.

at the same time, im looking around for a job; hopefully i'll be able to land on something not as bad as L**xens  - it was totally a horror. i've never complained so much about my job before, this was the first. but good thing is, its all the past now, but this means, no job no income. but i think its better than i have no income than continue to suffer.

this is the first day i am unemployed.
im not particularly happy or sad, cuz theres nothing i can do much about it
still thinking how i can bring some income home to manage the expenses.
will try my best, but same time trying not to feel stressed bout it.

Week 21.

i am at week 21 now. for the past 1.5 months i had been working at a local firm, however i find that it was difficult to meet expectations, hence i found myself not quite fit the job.

honestly, i needed alot of guidance and training which i was not given, i suspect i was expected to perform immediately, they probably forgot that i came from a non-HR background.

in addition, after all those things that happened in office, i spoke to my HB, he too agree i should not work for a boss like this.

in summary, i felt i was picked on and lacked support in many ways.

infrastructure wise, resources were missing, processes and procedures all over the place which added alot of confusion.

thus, i gave the one week notice, and will be leaving by mid of the week. :)

i am at week 13 now!
time flew so quickly, i last blogged at week 8, and more than a month just swooshed past so quickly.

so far everything is almost normal, during the first trimester i was easily tired and i cannot walk for long distances, i had to take breaks if we are out, and i had to take naps if i was home.

but once i hit week 13, everything changed! i can stay out for almost one full day but i had rests/breaks in between at cafes/starbucks, i slept later, almost back to the old lifestyle.

so far we got our FTS results, everything is low risk, we are pending the Harmony results. more looking forward to know the gender of the baby. however, i am more concerned about the chromosonal conditions like the Sex Chromosome Aneuploidies and 22q11.2 Microdeletion which is something additional from the FTS results we already received.

FTS already tested for trimsonies 13, 18 and 21 and the scan also included the NT, which are all normal and low risk which is good.

We went to KKH, with the intention to save some money because it is highly subsidised, as we are on a budget and we believe in investing the funds in the baby's nutrition and education.

After we went to KKH, we realised we probably made the right decision because they are probably the specialist in this. We decided that we may change to private in KKH after we get all the initial tests done and finalise on the gynae we are comfortable in. because at this point, we didnt ask anyone for recommendations and we dont know who is actually good or the best. and i guess the best means more expensive?

while i was worried bout my FTS and harmony results i suddenly thought of a friend who is also pregnant and 5 weeks ahead of me , i was surprised that she didnt go thru any of these tests, so im guessing its probably not compulsory. and she went to a private hospital.

i am probably around week 8 now...

this was dinner today! decided to cook cuz actually a little bit lazy to go out for dinner.
cooked spinach and salmon (again) cuz both are nutritious for the baby... and i really like salmon :)

been following zoeyraymond for a while on ig, and i think its also beneficial, what's her diet etc. seems interesting too.

she had avocado, biscuits and tuna for breakfast today, i always thought tuna is not suitable during pregnancy but she said its recommended by gynae, i think i will confirm that again when we see the gynae :)

last weekend has been extremely tough for us, because we discovered im pregnant.

the funniest thing was i didnt even know how to read the pregnancy test kit that we bought from the pharmacy. i actually stared at the result for a long while and thinking when the second line was gg to appear, but actually the greyish horizontal line was always there, and if the vertical line appears, it means positive.

i thought both lines had to be obvious to mean positive, but i was wrong.

the following morning we went to have it confirmed at the clinic. and yes it was positive.

right now it has been a battle for both of us, to keep or terminate, because we are afraid we are not ready for parenthood.

this news came too sudden for us, and we didnt expect to conceive so easily.

i guess i was too naive, i always thought conceiving is difficult and my friend told me its difficult.

but i guess if God wants to send this angel to anyone, we cannot stop Him.

i finally tendered my resignation to the company, and yes im not going to fly in a month's time.

today i encountered something which made me feel so upset and uncomfortable.

and i cannot give any details now, probably when i re-visit this post i may consider to talk about it, it can be a reminder for myself

i am happy to be home, enjoying the sofa and the tv